Quiet

It's nice and quiet now. The boys are sleeping. The house is relatively picked up, and I'm about to head to bed. Monty is in South Carolina, for more Chaplain training. He'll be there through the end of August. Life does look a bit different when he's not around. ( I have less laundry to do, so that is a plus ) Seriously, we do miss him. Yet, I'm so excited about this process. I'm so proud of his efforts to bring our family into the next phase of ministry. While he's gone, I"m going to try to get back into the habit of blogging. I have missed this outlet. It seems to get pushed aside when life gets crazy. Though I miss Monty, I do get some more quiet in my life while he is gone. Time for God to speak to me. Time for me to listen, to be still. Time to focus on Him.

My Bluebird

So, this is the pair of bluebirds that have nested in the birdhouse on our fence. They are so beautiful. Of course, I had to figure out what they liked to eat. So, the boys and I researched it on line and figured out that they like " mealworms". Of course then, I had to buy some at the Wildbird store. Of course, the worms have to be stored in my fridge. So, every morning and noon, I feed the bluebirds. The male comes and perches on my windowsill and eats some of the worms and takes some of back to the nest. The male has even been known to peck at my window if I forget to feed him. It's been such a fun deal. I'm so greatful to the Lord and His great creativity.

The Johnson boys color easter eggs

Enjoy this little video of the Johnson boys coloring eggs.....it was an adventure to say the least....

Sarah Beths Surgery

Hello All,

Sarah is scheduled to have her surgery tomorrow (Monday) between 5PM and 7 PM EST. Thanks for your prayers. We know that God has Sarah in His hands. We just pray that all goes well. Thanks again...

My Cousin Sarah

My Cousin, Sarah Beth, was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2005. Many of you reading this already know this story, but some of you don't. I won't go into the details of the past 4 years...if you're interested in knowing, please read her online diary at www.loveyourguts.com ..it's worth your time. The cancer metastasized - the main area of concern in the past year (plus) has been her brain. She has already had one surgery in 2007 to remove a brain tumor. The brain tumor they have been monitoring is now around 4cm. The symptoms/difficulty it causes her are worsening. She's kind of been in a holding pattern waiting for her doctors to come to some conclusion about what to do. chemo has been hanging there as an option, but yesterday she was advised by the 3 of them - her neurosurgeon/oncologist/radiation oncologist to go ahead with surgery and then chemo. So that's what she's going to do. They want her to do it sooner rather than later and gave her the option of today (saturday) or early in the week. She's going with early in the week, so it will be monday or tuesday. One of her reasons for wanting to wait until then is to give people more time to pray. she knows the power of prayer and feels the support of so many through that. it makes all the difference for her...so, that said..the reason for this note is to ask you to pray for her, whether you know her or not. If God moves you to do so, please pray. Please also pray for her Mom and Dad (Mark and Kathleen), her brothers (Jeremy and Jason), and the rest of us..we love this precious girl so very much. She is loved by many.Thank you, in advance, for lifting her up to the Lord, for speaking her name to Him and laying her and her circumstance at His feet.

Why blame the dark for being dark?

I'm reading an interesting book these days. The author has many great ideas, and thoughts that have made me stop and think. He has some great thoughts about what the church could be, how the church was meant to act and what it's ultimate purpose is. Most of my life I've grown up in churches that are strong and take stands on issues. Which is great. That needs to be done. However, when I get email forwards asking me to boycott a certain actor for statements made at the Emmys, or listing all the wrong things with a particular celebrity or politician, I tend to think differently now. One thing the author said was "why blame the dark for being dark", instead, think why are Christians are not more full of light? Will a person be drawn to Christ because I boycott? Or will they come to Christ because I love them? Am I going to sit within the comfort of my christian world and refuse to purchase bubble gum because someone said they don't like Jesus? Does forming a picket line show God's love to people who desperatley need it? C'mon.....is that really what being a light is?

My Boys

So..I don't really think they were napping...do you?

Hawks

I first noticed the Hawk on the telephone pole as I was driving home from work. It was 14 years ago. I was going through a very painful breakup with my ex fiance. Everyday, as I climbed into my car, the tears would flow. I would cry all the way home. I noticed that every day, on the same fence post, was a hawk. After awhile, I started looking for him. Everyday, he was there. It seemed to me, that in the midst of the pain, God sent this Hawk to be a representative of his presence.

Since that time, I believe that God has sent me Hawks to tell me that it's going to be OK. Like the time one landed in my tree, just outside my front window in downtown Joplin. I had just received a call from the Doctor telling me that JD needed to be admitted to the hospital, he was only 3 days old. As the tears started to flow, the hawk landed in my tree and looked at me. A wave of peace came over me and I knew it was going to be OK. Or there was the time where Monty was out of work and we didn't know how we were going to meet any of our bills, and I saw a hawk on the power lines right outside our back door. Then there was the time I was on a walk two days before I had Nathan. A Hawk swooped down in my suburban neighborhood and landed in the street right in front of me. He paused, looked at me and then flew off. Two days later I had a ruptured Uterus and Nathan entered the world by emergency C-section. As I was laying on the table, I remembered the hawk. I knew it was going to be OK.

I saw one today. I was eating lunch with the boys and a hawk landed on a power line right outside the window. He looked at me and nodded and then flew off. Once again, I felt at peace. God is here, in the midst.

Our God is so mighty, so powerful that He can use the birds of the air to minister to us, his children who need to know his presence. I'm not sure why He chose a hawk for me. I just know He did. I'm reminded of the verse that states.." Look at the birds of the air, they do not sow or reap or gather food, but your heavenly father feeds them. How much more valuable are you to your heavenly Father than they..."

A Christmas I Corinthians 13

If I decorate my house perfectly with plaid bows, strands of twinkling lights and shiny balls, but do not show love to my family, I'm just another decorator.

If I slave away in the kitchen baking dozens of Christmas cookies, preparing gourmet meals and arranging a beautifully adorned table at mealtime, but do not show love to my family, I'm just another cook.

If I work at the soup kitchens, carol in the nursing homes, and give all that I have to charity, but do not show love to my family, it profits me nothing.

If I trim the tree with shimmering angels and crocheted snowflakes, attend a myriad of holiday parties, and sing in the choir's cantata but do not focus on Christ, I have missed the point.

Love stops the cooking to hug the child.
Love sets aside the decorating to kiss the husband.
Love is kind, though harried and tired.
Love doesn't envy another's home that has coordinated Christmas china and table linens.
Love doesn't yell at the kids to get out of the way, but is thankful they are there to be in the way.
Love doesn't give only to those who are able to give in return, but rejoices in giving to those who can't.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails. Video games will break, pearl necklaces will be lost, golf clubs will rust, but giving the gift of love will endure.

Merry Christmas
Author unknown

JD and the Manger

JD has been very intruiged with the Nativity scene as of late. Today I grabbed the camera and asked him a few questions. Thought you might enjoy...

YEah! It's Christmas season again! The tree is up, the mantel is lit up and my wonderful husband loaded 13 CD's worth of Christmas music onto my Ipod. I am a happy camper!

We went and cut down our tree again this year. Such a fun tradition. The boys love it more each year. Enjoy the pictures..

When I think of you...

It's 8:17 am.  I just got Caleb on the bus and headed to school.  The other two boys are still asleep...and I'm enjoying my first cup of coffee and the quiet that is so rare in this house. 

God has been working on me over the past few weeks.  I had just felt "off", not depressed or sad, just kinda "blah."  I wanted so badly to "feel and see" God in my daily life.  For so many years I felt like we have gone from crisis to crisis.  Be it a move, job loss, premature baby or loss of a loved one, we've faced those head on.  In the midst of  the crisis, I know how to act.  I know how to trust in God...it's my only option.  Living in surrender is easy during a crisis. 

 These past two and a half years I 've lived in the same house, worshipped at the same church, shopped at the same Wal-Mart.  Stability is a wonderful thing.  Yet in the midst of stability, I've found it easy to stagnate.  To get comfortable.  I've found it hard to stay faithful in my time with God.   I have not felt the same closeness to the Lord that I felt during those raw moments of grief or fear.   I know that God has not changed.  His arms still encircle me, his love is the same.  My sense of it is just different for some reason.

However, I've heard God whisper to me over the past few weeks.  His whisper is gentle and has stirred my heart in ways that I've longed for.  I was listening to a Michael W Smiths new worship CD  in the car the other day, and found myself WEEPING out of sheer love for Jesus. 

One song in particular has the African Childrens Choir in it.  The song talks about how much Jesus really does love us.  These kids are singing words like..." When I think of you I see you dancing...when I think of you I see you smiling at me...When I think of you  I see you praying for me.."  The very thought of Jesus smiling at me, dancing and singing....it's such a visual to me of his love...his covering and his faithfulness in the storm and in the calm.

Here is a clip of the song that I found on Youtube....  

Museum, Movie and the Moon

It's Monty's Drill weekend, and I always try to do somthing fun with the boys when he is out of town. Today was a great day....

Our adventures started out with me taking the boys to the Philbrook Museum here in Tulsa, OK. The museum has a FREE (yes, no charge) program for kids. They get an art box with supplies that they get to keep, and they had three different projects for the kids to do. The boys had a blast working on the different crafts. I was greatful for a fully supplied craft studio with helpers! We were there for almost two hours. So fun! (Thanks Jenni for the heads up about this program!)

We also saw a mantinee showing of Madagascar 2. Near my house there is a theater that shows the NEW movies for $2.50 per person. Gotta love that!

After the movie was over, we went home and I got the boys ready for bed. I told them we had to put on "Footie" jammies. We then grabbed some blankets and to thier delight we headed out to the backyard. We all snuggled under the blankets and watched the moon, the stars. The boys were giddy and wide eyed. It was so much fun!

We came inside and had some hot chocolate. I watched thier little faces smile and listened to thier great little giggles as they slurped up the half melted marshmallows. We then brushed teeth, read our stories, said our prayers and I tucked them each in bed.

It was a great day....thank you Lord

Groundhog Day...

I haven't posted much recently.  I have had lots of memorable moments with the boys.  Life is never dull with them around.  However, there are times when I don't feel like I have much to say.  It's almost like life gets turned into a Mommy version of the movie "Groundhog Day."  It's the same day everyday...

I don't want it to be like that.  I don't think it will stay this way.  It's just how I've felt over the past few weeks.  Funny, how life can be a new adventure for children everyday..and I get stuck looking at the sink full of dishes, the laundry that needs folded, the diapers that need changed, the food that needs prepared.  I think that's the challenge for Moms.  It's finding the extraordinary in the ordinary.  It's waking up...and not just walking through life in that "Mom" daze.   

My prayer is that God will "wake me up" .  I know the these days will pass all to quickly.  I don't want to miss them.... 

I love Fall

I love fall.  I love the cooler weather (although Tulsa does not get cool quickly enough for my tastes...).  I love Fall activities.  I love taking the boys to Pumpkin Patches and Apple Orchards.

I love that I can have the windows open.  I love that our air conditioning bills are down and our heating bills have not started to rise.  I love long sleeved T-shirts and jeans.  I love a cup of hot coffee in the morning when it's chilly outside.  I love the leaves turning.  I love driving along a tree lined street when the wind blows leaves off the trees and they tumble down around my car.  I love pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks.  I love season premiers of my favorite TV Shows.  I love Fall!

Immanuel - Songs Of Praise

This was absolutely beautiful. I sang in choirs all through grade school, middle school, High School and College. I would have loved to just stand in the middle of this sanctuary and listen....

God is in Control

My Dad had surgery today. His back has been giving him a lot of problems as of late. He went to the Doctor last week, and they scheduled and MRI. The radiologist contacted my Dad right away and told him it was imperative that he see a neurosurgeon. He got into the Neurosurgeon on Wednesday. The Surgeon postponed his vacation so he operate on my Dad today. It's a been a whirlwind. I'm glad to report that the surgery went well. There was some risk that he would have some permanent nerve damage that would leave him in a wheelchair. Praise God they were able to get in there and stop the progression of that nerve damage. There are a few other issues he will have to deal with due to some permanent nerve damage in other areas, but we are just so grateful that he will be able to walk! None of us knew it was this "bad". We knew he was in a lot of pain, but we did not know the danger he was in. Thank you Lord for taking care of him!

Another great thing happend today. As many of you know, my little Caleb has some severe speech delay issues. He is almost 4 and communicates at about a 2-2 1/2 year old level. He will "parrot" a lot of words back to you, but does not communicate needs or wants with words. We have him in a speech delay preschool and have used some sign language with him. It's very exhausting trying to figure out what he wants. I just want to know what is going on in that little noggin.

Today, I took the boys to a pumpkin patch. Caleb picked up a little pumpkin and said... "Turtle hungry". What is remarkable about this statement, is he is recalling the memory of a different pumpkin patch that we went to A YEAR AGO. They had a large tortoise there that was eating a small pumpkin. The more I thought about it, the more choked up I got. He was able to, for the first time, relay a memory to me. A memory that he has up there in his little head...and it was finally able to make it past his lips...and I could understand what he was saying. It was a HUGE deal, and leaves me in tears still.

Both of these events, though very different , impress on me that God is in control. He is moving and even though the progress may be slow or the process painful, He is in control. He is in control.....

Saved by Love

I love my boys.   They are amazing little gifts.  I am so greatful for the time God has given us with each of them.  However, in the midst of having a 2, 3 and 4 year old, I'm tired.  I'm flat out exhausted.  I want to be the best wife and mother that I can be. I've only got one shot at this.  It's just hard sometimes.  I've been struggling lately.  I'm easily annoyed and frustrated.  This is not who I am.  It's not who I want to be.  It's just a tiring season.  I want to raise these boys up to love and serve the Lord.  I desire for them to fall in love with Jesus and to be great men of God.  I need refreshing.  I need to know I'm doing a good job.  I don't want to fail at the greatest oppourtunity God has given me.  

I think sometimes when the day is over, the toys are picked up, the dishes done and the house is quiet is when I feel the most overwhelmed and relieved all at once.  It's a strange emotion.  I can't really explain it.  Maybe other of you stay at home Moms know what I mean.  Its at these moments when I truly need to cling to my Father in heaven.  He knows what I can handle.  He knows where my breaking points are.  He knows what I need.  The rest I desire is not just physical, it's emotional and spiritual as well.  Lord...help me on this road of Motherhood, to be who you want me to be.  Nothing more, nothing less.  

Jesus Is My Friend

Ok..sit back and laugh. My sister sent me this clip the other day. All I can say is ...."wow...."

Summer 2008

Here is a taste of our summer...now that it's all over....